I hate eating!

I hate eating. There, it bears repeating. Nothing tastes good to me anymore. I am about three and a half months out of gastric bypass, and I just don't like the taste of anything. If it wasn't for my stomach grumbling and aching, I probably wouldn't eat.

I used to like to get things from the pizza shop. Everything I have tried from there -- in small portions, of course -- and it all tastes like slime that sit in the stomach. Mind, I don't get sick. I only get that when I eat too fast or eat too much. That's what surgery does for you. I just don't like the taste of food. It isn't such a fun thing anymore. Nothing tastes good.

I do have some low calorie candies, but even them just make me feel bloated and icky. There is only so much tuna and salmon and chicken and tuna again that I can eat before I go completely bonkers.

The good news is that I've lost almost 100 pounds since last January and 50 pounds since surgery. My hair is falling out, though. That's not fun, but not that noticeable, either. I would do it again in a half of a heartbeat, but I just wish food tasted good again.

Image via WikipediaWell, maybe I don't. The more I am adverse to eating it the better able I am to maintain my loss.

I'm off to watch my beloved Steelers -- and the rest of football that is on today -- and cheer them to victory. Hope everyone is having a great Sunday out in blog land.

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Thanksgiving

Well, today will be my first major holiday with gastri bypass. It's sort of a weird moment. I don't feel like I will be missing out on much, really. I actually find that I rather hate eating. I have all of these expectations of how the food will taste and they are never fulfilled. Even if the expectation is fulfilled, I end up feeling to full or to sick. I'm not displeased. I just don't want to eat. It's like a chore for me.

So, I will sit down to Thanksgiving dinner with my family tonight and I will ponder what the past three months post op have done for me. They made me hate eating and lost me 50 pounds. Again, I'm not displeased.

I wish I could eat a hamburger or something and not have it hurt. I think that is my old self coming through. I just want to eat like that again, but still lose the weight. My eating is not difficult and as long as I behave myself I feel no discomfort. The joy has gone from eating. I no longer take immense joy in the feeling of food and the wondrous taste of it. Again, not complaining, but wishing I could still have that love affair.

Well, I guess I am complaining because I want food back, but I don't really. I'm much better off. I miss it like a bad boy lover. You know it isn't good for you, but it is sooooo goddamned good to taste. Now, nothing really tastes good. It's fuel and nothing more. I need to find my new joy. Maybe I ought to find it in writing again, as per the post above.

Any fiction written yet? No, but I've thought about it seriously. So seriously, in fact, my brow furrowed. No, seriously.

Thanksgiving -- bring on the turkey and the keyboard. There will be joy yet.

Picture from Flickr creative Commons by riptheskull

Pregnancy and Gastric Bypass

Some Pregnancy-Related Complications Minimized for Women Who Have Had Weight-Loss Surgery - MarketWatch: "ROCKVILLE, Md., Nov 18, 2008 /PRNewswire-USNewswire via COMTEX/ -- Women who undergo weight-loss surgery, known as bariatric surgery, and later become pregnant after losing weight may be at lower risk for pregnancy-related diabetes and high blood pressure -- complications that can seriously affect the mother or her baby -- than pregnant women who are obese, according to new findings from the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality that are published in the November 19 issue of JAMA."

This is awesome research done about cause near and dear to my heart. One of the reasons I had surgery was to have children. Mitigating the complications of pregnancy is what this is all about. Infertile and PCOS women rejoice!

Thoughts on Gastric Bypass Surgery

The Dangers of Gastric Bypass Surgery

I had gastric bypass surgery three months ago. I did not have lap band but decided to have the "stomach stapling" that is more permanent. My experiences reflect this type of surgery only. I know that some people are convinced that it is unsafe, but I feel that it has saved my life. Here are a few reasons why gastric bypass is safer than staying fat.

1. The co-morbidities

In the health field, co-morbitity means symptoms and disease processes that are related to the original disease. Morbid obesity is a fatal disease with many co-morbities. For instance, diabetes has been shown to have a direct correlation with obesity. More research needs to be done on this, but there is a very strong link between the two. Amputations and blindness, among other horrors, await those with this disease. I would rather have a fighting chance.

Joint issues, sleep apnea, and depression are all linked to obesity as well. These conditions severely effect quality of life and can be life threatening. What sort of life do you have when you can't even walk up a flight of stairs? No life at all, really. It is more dangerous to fight the co-morbitities than it is to risk surgery.

2. Death is not common

I work with bariatric patients as a nurse on a post op floor. I see all of the people who have the surgeries and all of those who come back with problems. In all of the time our practice has been open, there have been two deaths in a thousand. I put my life in the hands of this surgeon and trusted that this ultimate consequence would not happen to me. There are far worse complications to this surgery than death, and none of them are very common. We have 5-10 bariatric surgery patients on our floor, but we only see one or two back per every few months. Noncompliance is usually a determining factor for complications.

3. Compliance, compliance, compliance

The secret trick to safe bariatric surgery is to follow your surgeon's rules to the letter. Failing to do so will land you in the hospital time and again. You will be subjected to quite a bit of suffering. The risks of bariatric surgery come from the patient themselves in most situations. If don't drink liquids during meals, stop smoking, and eat your protein first, you will have a good chance of avoiding complications. Supplements are also important. Failing to take supplements can lead to crippling osteoporosis, deficiency of the B vitamins, and anemia. The non compliant patient is usually the patient with complications.

However, this is not always true. Things such as intractable nausea, bowel obstruction, and blood clots are largely out of the patient's hands. It is a gamble worth taking if it means a full life. My life expectancy before surgery was little more than sixty years of age -- if that. Now, however, it is open. The long term effects of this surgery have yet to be fully researched, but I feel I stand a better chance now. Gastric bypass surgery is safer than the population at large believes. As always, consult your doctor's beforehand. They know your health better than anyone. Do your research, ask yourself if you can face the difficulties of life after surgery, and be ready to take a gamble that just may save your life.